Couple Counseling:

What is “Relational Life Therapy?”

Relational Life Therapy (RLT) is a uniquely proactive form of psychological counseling that teaches people how to make their relationships work so that everyone can enjoy Full Respect Living and craft a healthy life legacy. It is based on the work of internationally renowned psychotherapist, Terrence Real, through more than two decades in private practice and his research through the Relational Life Institute.

Argie Spuck incorporates many of the principles and methods of Relational Life Therapy into the counselling she provides to her clients.

What is Imago Relationship Therapy?

Imago Relationship Therapy is an integrated theory and process for working with couples who seek to enhance their relationship. Based on the groundbreaking work of Harville Hendrix, Ph.D., author of Getting the Love You Want, Keeping the Love You Find, and Giving the Love That Heals.

Imago therapy is a wonderfully effective and safe approach to helping relationship partners grow into understanding each other more fully and relating more honestly as they evolve into greater wholeness as individuals within the relational context they share.

The basic principles of Imago Relationship Therapy are as follows:

• We were born whole and complete.
• We became wounded during the early nurturing and socialization stages of development by our primary caretakers.
• We have a composite image of all the positive and negative traits of our primary caretakers deep in our unconscious mind. This is called the Imago. It is like the unconscious blueprint of the one we need to be our partner in a committed, intimate relationship.
• We look for someone who is an “Imago match,” that is, someone who matches up with the composite image of our primary caretakers. This is important because we marry or commit for the purpose of healing and finishing the unfinished business of childhood. Our parents are the ones who wounded us, but a primary love partner who matches their traits is their stand-in.
• Romantic love is the door to a committed relationship and/or marriage and is nature’s way of connecting us with the perfect partner for our eventual healing.
• We move into a power struggle as soon as we make a commitment to this person. The power struggle is necessary, for imbedded in a couple’s frustrations lies the information for healing and growth.
• The first two stages of a committed relationship, “romantic love” and the “power struggle,” are engaged in at an unconscious level. Our unconscious mind chose our partner for the purpose of healing childhood wounds.
• Inevitably, our love partner is incompatible with us and least able to meet our needs and most able to wound us all over again.
• The goal of Imago Relationship Therapy is to align our conscious mind, which usually wants happiness and good feelings, with the agenda of the unconscious mind, which wants healing and growth. Thus, the goal of therapy is to assist clients to develop conscious, intimate, committed relationships.
• This transition cannot take place through insight alone. Specific skills and processes are necessary that need to be practiced daily to shift us from having an unconscious relationship to a conscious relationship.
• It takes commitment, courage, consciousness, patience, and love to create a safe, loving, and passionate relationship.

Would you like to…
• End power struggles, and resolve cycles of anger, blaming and shaming?
• Learn to feel safe in your relationship and learn how to trust?
• Increase your ability to communicate effectively and resolve conflicts with ease?
• Restore passion and intimacy to your marriage/relationship?
• Deepen the experience of love, connection, and understanding between you and your partner?

For further information, call
Argie Spuck at 954.822.9793 or
email me at Argie@argiespuck.com.